A Spiritual Quandry

Read most of my blogs or comments to my friend's blogs. My opinions on religion in general and Christianity specifically are well documented. As an expecting father I'm now faced with something that I was hoping to never revisit. Baptism.

Baptism is an purifying ritual bath where the sins are "washed away" with water and the person is then purified into the faith. I never understood the need for that. If Christ died for the sins of all mankind wouldn't that render baptism obsolete? There are so many Christian contradictions, but that isn't what this blog is regarding.

Back to the matter at hand. We've decided my father will administer and conduct my child's baptism. Yes, that means we've decided to baptize the kid as well. There are several reasons for this decision.

1. The "just in case" scenario. Let's say that shit they pump your full of in church is actually true, baptism is a good idea. If not at least the child's hair gets washed that day.
2. My whole family is more than a little religious and VERY Lutheran. Not baptizing my child would cause more headaches than I care to have and it's not that big of a deal to me or my wife.
3. My father is a pastor. He can do it, and it will elate him to do it. It makes everyone's life a little happier.
4. Lutheran Baptism = Family gathering = food and drink. 'nuff said.

I was almost paralyzed with fear every Sunday as a child and young adult. I had a constant reminder that since I doubted what they told me and I wasn't sure if I believed it or not, I was going to hell. I was going to suffer for all eternity because I didn't buy into the bullshit they were trying to sell. That is crippling, believe me. Many soul-searching years later I came to peace and understanding of how Christianity works and how the intimidation and propaganda department start working on us when we are very young to scare us into submission.

My soul-searching has lead me to a belief structure of E-Rockism. (I should have myself ordained and take the tax shelter, but that will be later.) I actually paid attention in church when I was young. I asked questions that my elders weren't prepared to answer. I wasn't satisfied with their answers so I sought out the answers I was looking for. Through my studies both biblical and secular I found some of the answers I was looking for.

A brief but incomplete list

1. A singular god makes sense and that leads into the concept of a creator and that makes sense.
2. Creationism and Evolution are not mutually exclusive.
3. The idea of a savior, though a little hokey, is comforting.
4. Trying to understand something as incomprehensible as the almighty is a fruitless effort.
5. Giving a gender and a name to the almighty is only to satisfy the human need to relate.
6. Regardless of who wrote them, the 10 commandments and "Do unto others" are good rules of thumb.
7. Forcing your faith on others isn't a loving act.
8. Hating those that don't share your faith isn't going to get you to heaven any faster.
9. "Hate the sin, love the sinner" is total bullshit.

We have to choose a "sponsor" for the baptism. The sponsor is an individual or a couple that are responsible for the spiritual well being of the child in the event of the parent's early demise. The "godfather" and "godmother". Where do we find this person? My wife isn't anything near Christian and I'm in recovery. We want this kid to be able to make up their own mind on a system of beliefs and find one that offers peace in their life. I won't force religion down his/her throat like it was mine.

I can only think of one person that is capable of accomplishing this task. My wife agrees with me and I will be asking them shortly. If they agree to it, I'll post who it is. If not, they will remain anonymous.

In any event, there is going to be a party, but some of that fear that paralyzed me as a child is creeping back in. What if I'm wrong? What if I create a life that falls short of the plan? That is supposed to condemn me as well. See why I hate Christianity? That crippling fear keeps the church populated and keeps donations flowing in. In Christianity, one has to sell their soul in order to save it.
I hope I'm right on this one... I don't want to screw it up for the kid as well...