I Can't Be Good at Everything

I found something that I suck at this weekend. Photography. Sure, I can take some little point and click camera and take candids, but give me options and I'm screwed. I had opportunity to use a Nikkon Digital SLR camera yesterday and everything came out blurry, dark, or overexposed. I understand HOW to take good photos, I know what would make a good photo, but I can't do it. Aperture, focus, zoom, white balance, exposure time, flash, shutter speed... it's one thing to know what they do. It's another to understand how they all work together. I feel a trip to the bookstore is in my near future. I'll learn how to do this.

A Spiritual Quandry

Read most of my blogs or comments to my friend's blogs. My opinions on religion in general and Christianity specifically are well documented. As an expecting father I'm now faced with something that I was hoping to never revisit. Baptism.

Baptism is an purifying ritual bath where the sins are "washed away" with water and the person is then purified into the faith. I never understood the need for that. If Christ died for the sins of all mankind wouldn't that render baptism obsolete? There are so many Christian contradictions, but that isn't what this blog is regarding.

Back to the matter at hand. We've decided my father will administer and conduct my child's baptism. Yes, that means we've decided to baptize the kid as well. There are several reasons for this decision.

1. The "just in case" scenario. Let's say that shit they pump your full of in church is actually true, baptism is a good idea. If not at least the child's hair gets washed that day.
2. My whole family is more than a little religious and VERY Lutheran. Not baptizing my child would cause more headaches than I care to have and it's not that big of a deal to me or my wife.
3. My father is a pastor. He can do it, and it will elate him to do it. It makes everyone's life a little happier.
4. Lutheran Baptism = Family gathering = food and drink. 'nuff said.

I was almost paralyzed with fear every Sunday as a child and young adult. I had a constant reminder that since I doubted what they told me and I wasn't sure if I believed it or not, I was going to hell. I was going to suffer for all eternity because I didn't buy into the bullshit they were trying to sell. That is crippling, believe me. Many soul-searching years later I came to peace and understanding of how Christianity works and how the intimidation and propaganda department start working on us when we are very young to scare us into submission.

My soul-searching has lead me to a belief structure of E-Rockism. (I should have myself ordained and take the tax shelter, but that will be later.) I actually paid attention in church when I was young. I asked questions that my elders weren't prepared to answer. I wasn't satisfied with their answers so I sought out the answers I was looking for. Through my studies both biblical and secular I found some of the answers I was looking for.

A brief but incomplete list

1. A singular god makes sense and that leads into the concept of a creator and that makes sense.
2. Creationism and Evolution are not mutually exclusive.
3. The idea of a savior, though a little hokey, is comforting.
4. Trying to understand something as incomprehensible as the almighty is a fruitless effort.
5. Giving a gender and a name to the almighty is only to satisfy the human need to relate.
6. Regardless of who wrote them, the 10 commandments and "Do unto others" are good rules of thumb.
7. Forcing your faith on others isn't a loving act.
8. Hating those that don't share your faith isn't going to get you to heaven any faster.
9. "Hate the sin, love the sinner" is total bullshit.

We have to choose a "sponsor" for the baptism. The sponsor is an individual or a couple that are responsible for the spiritual well being of the child in the event of the parent's early demise. The "godfather" and "godmother". Where do we find this person? My wife isn't anything near Christian and I'm in recovery. We want this kid to be able to make up their own mind on a system of beliefs and find one that offers peace in their life. I won't force religion down his/her throat like it was mine.

I can only think of one person that is capable of accomplishing this task. My wife agrees with me and I will be asking them shortly. If they agree to it, I'll post who it is. If not, they will remain anonymous.

In any event, there is going to be a party, but some of that fear that paralyzed me as a child is creeping back in. What if I'm wrong? What if I create a life that falls short of the plan? That is supposed to condemn me as well. See why I hate Christianity? That crippling fear keeps the church populated and keeps donations flowing in. In Christianity, one has to sell their soul in order to save it.
I hope I'm right on this one... I don't want to screw it up for the kid as well...

Adventure

I went on an adventure today. After work Paul, Tamiko and I decided to explore the greater Dayton railroad system to find the bum campground. Bum Camp is less than a mile away from my shop tucked away under 4 track rail bridge that is well hidden betwen 2 warehouses.

We found it from above. Looking over the bridge, we saw beds (pads stolen from patio furniture), a couch (without cushions), and a lot of empty 40 oz beer bottles. We also smelled and heard a camp fire. All the luxury of home without the nagging problem of a mortgage payment and no carpets to vacuum. I was wondering where they bathe and shit until I found them taking a bum bath in the restroom of the warehouse where my shop is.

The secret bum lair is also no secret to the police. They drive by constantly and do nothing. I pondered this for a while and came up with a reason why they're ignored. Bum camp is located in the sketchy warehouse area with empty buildings and vacant lots. The downtown area is less than a mile west, however there are railroads and bridges separating the bustling metropolis from the desolate warehouses. Provided the vagrant population stays away from downtown, no one cares that they are there. The ones that live in parks and bus stops downtown are constantly harassed by the cops.

So we know where they are, and why they set up camp there, but now I feel another mission. I want to why they're bums. I have to know how someone can come to living under a bridge and why they choose to stay there and not improve their situation. Yes, I know crack and meth are contributing factors, but the question remains.

The FIRST Pictures

Below are the first pictures of my child. We have progressed from the bean stage to the turtle stage. This is also the first time I've ever seen this person. I had a whole list of names picked out and now that I see this little human being, I wonder what their name is. Assigning one just doesn't seem right. This little one has a personality (if he/she's anything like their old man it's an abrasive one too!) but what is it? I don't know. This is a small problem that I should have solved by download day. Stay Tuned.

For now, look in reverence at my tiny evil genius just waiting in there... ...nine months to develop the master plan. You've been warned. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!

The Spirit of The Radio

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Hapy Easter, Pass The Potatoes, Hold The Religion Please, I Think I've Had Enough

Easter. The holiday that the Christians took from the pagans (Ostara) and converted into the day commerating the resurrection of Jesus Christ. The ancient Christians took this holiday because they wanted to convert more pagans to their faith. They assumed that it would be easier to have common ground with their target audience. (it wasn't until centuries later that the Vatican discovered that threats, torture and executions were more effective).

Here's a list of "good Christian" links for you.

God Hates Fags

Landover Baptist

KKK