Holiday Mayhem

In the 'Natti there was a scandal over the last few days. A week or so ago, somebody or somebodies slashed and killed a giant inflatable Frosty the Snowman in someone's front yard.

The distraught owner of said Frosty, repaired him and installed a security camera to help babysit him. Wouldn't you know it? The rascals came back and slashed up Frosty again. This time it was caught on tape.

Of course the vandals were caught and are on the road to prosecution, but who was the victim here?

Frosty?

He didn't feel a thing.

Frosty's owner?

HELL NO. He was victimizing his neighborhood. Those thing are gaudy, tasteless and tacky. White Trash America has embraced the December holidays as an excuse to put more shitty lawn decorations out in a contest to see who can be the tackiest display since Clark Griswold.

These guys should be rewarded and their story told as a warning to all inflatable lawn decoration owners. Then they need to make a video slashing all other forms of inflatable lawn ornaments, and NASCAR flags.

The lesson to be learned from this is "Don't put gaudy, tasteless or tacky shit visible in your yard and your neighbors won't destroy it.

The Dichotomy of People

I use myspace to keep in touch with old friends, friends afar, and proessional contacts. I understand that the majority of users are looking for a piece of ass and get it.

We all know who these people are. When you get a chance, look at their profiles. In the picture section there is always the pic of her chunkier than average body in her skimpy underwear. Then there is a pic of the illegitimate child with the caption that reads "my reason for living" Then there is the group drunk pic.

When you click back to their profile, you'll see the glitter image of the playboy bunny, "hottie", Paris Hilton and Jenna Jameson are on their "who I'd like to meet", and then you read about their love for Jesus and how wonderfully Christian they are in their about me section.

Or you have the professional people that have a secret internet life. These people are accountants, sales reps, or other corporate types that have spouses, children, clients, and other influences that would flip if they ever read the sex surveys that get posted from these morons daily.

I generally hate surveys anyway, but it cracks me up to see some shirt and tie guy with a profile pic of him holding his toddler, posting a bulletin about threesomes, double penetration and such.

People just don't think.

It's funny.

Bored Blogging

- 2:15 a.m.

- Northampton, MA

- Best Western, the nation's largest hotel chain.

I know this because it's written all over all their documentation. One would think that the largest of something would be the best. One would think that if "best" is in the title, then it would be the best.

One would be sadly mistaken.

These hotels are on par with a Red Roof that hasn't been refurbished in 20 years. I feel like I should be paying by the hour for this room, and bad porn should be on every t.v. channel.

So that's the setting. I'm not sure why I detailed that, save that I'm extremely bored. Saturday is it... ...homeward bound, away from some great new friends and away from some major douchebags. The douchebags I'll miss more than the friends.

Why? I'll see the friends again. The douchebags, I will not. So all I have is memories of them and why they are douchebags. Hopefully they know who they are, if not... ...they will before we part ways. Trust me.

New York

We had a night off and an opportunity to go into the city for a few hours. I love this city. Here's a tidbit. There are more pics, just not uploaded. I'm lazy.


Rockefeller Center Ice Skating

NYC Christmas Tree

The Wrecking Crew in Times Square

I haven't been to New York since 9/11/01. The last time I was in the city, the towers were standing where this hole is now. It's sobering. In a city that is noisy, busy and rude, the area around this site is SILENT. The few people that were nearby were all talking in their "church voices." The atmosphere was eerie, if not creepy. I'm trying to avoid talking politics, but it's hard not to hate after seeing this. Emotions ran from sorrow to rage and back again. Look at these. This is not stock film. This is not from a network, this is from my camera yesterday. If you're not pissed off, there's something wrong with you.

Getting Well

I'm running into day 5 of being sick on tour. I think Im over the hump, but I'm going to take it easy for a little while. No doctors, no antibiotics, nothing except excessive amounts of Robitussin, Airborne, hot tea, and 30 minute steaming showers.

I'll be within spitting distance of NYC tomorrow evening, and for the rest of the tour (except when we take a day in Amherst, MA). Hopefully I'll get to spend a little time with my family and perhaps get to do some of the fun New York Christmas things that never occur while living in Southen Ohio.

Cheers, fuckers... I'll be home in 2 weeks.

I Got Mine

So I got mine...

After I originated the pranking, I got served

I'm not pissed... I had it coming... actually, it's pretty funny, but my cell phone got fried in the process of being doused with water, salsa, honey mustard, shaving cream and God knows what else.

Goat, however... has a problem thinking things through. His luggage is in my room. Now he wants it. Hmmmmmm...

His bed is in my room.

Hmmmmm...

A word to the wise, plan thoroughly... plan for every outcome... because things may backfire!

Fuck OSU Fans

Yes, I rooted for the Buckeyes yesterday. Yes, I won a bet with my wife on that game, but I am not and never will be an OSU fan because of their classless, redneck fanbase.

I was in Columbus earlier this week before the game doing shows with displaceD. We all agree these people are insane. We heard death threats against people wearing Michigan clothes. We saw a car with a Michigan sticker get pounded with rocks and cinder blocks. There is no friendly competition.

Now, from South Bend, IN. I turn on CNN and see that there were 40-50 arrests, more than a dozen fires and 8 cars flipped over to CELEBRATE the victory.

"Hey let's tear someone else's shit up because our team won!!!!! Woo Hoo!!!"

Guess what? in 49 days they play for the National Championship. They'll probably win that one too. What kind of bedlam will come out of that?

I reiterate. I'm happy the Bucs won, but these "fans" are giving the team a shitty name.

Bullshitters

My friends, how many of you know this kind of guy?

The guy that manages to schmooze his way through life... the guy that can bullshit and smile his way into anything... the guy who has a job based on a presumption that he knows something about anything all the while he doesn't know shit from shineola...

I'm dealing with a schmuck like this a lot lately. All I want to do is throw him from the balcony of my hotel, but someone else would STILL have to clean up his mess. This fucking guy needs to go home NOW. No gas money, no farethewells, get the fuck out of here and away from this tour.

Sorry... I needed to vent.

Election Day

Several of my dear friends are posting bulletins begging people to go out and vote. Their sentiments are begging voters to go out and oust the Republicans.

My request is opposite.

Don't vote.

If you are going out with an attitude of voting for a specific party; If you vote based on how your church, parents, place of business, general demographic, or any outside influence tells you rather than voting based on the issues at hand and how they impact our society, don't vote. It makes a mockery of our republic and weakens our way of life.

Vote for whomever you choose, but make an informed decision. Visit the League of Women Voters website. This organization has all issues and candidates laid out for an individual to make a decision on without bias or outside influence.

Get smart, people. freedom isn't cheap.

A Little Bit of Nothing

I'm tired, I don't know where I am or what day it is, but I wouldn't want to do anything else. That's about it. I don't have much to say today.

Update

For my wife. Here's the finalized and remaining tour schedule. It looks like I'll be home sooner than expected. This is good and bad. Good, I have time to get some xmas shit done. Bad, I have to get chores done.

10/29-10/31
University of Louisville

11/1-11/04
University of Tennessee

11/5-11/07
University of Virginia

11/8-11/11
University of Maryland

11/12-11/14
Ohio State University

11/15-11/18
University of Notre Dame

11/19-11/21
Ohio University

11/22-11/25
University at Buffalo

11/26-11/28
Penn State

11/29-11/30
DePaul University

11/30-12/1
Syracuse University

12/2-12/3
University at Albany

12/4-12/5
University of Massachusetts
Amherst

12/6-12/7
Rutgers - New Brunswick

12/8
Mystery School

Celebrity Beef

As a general rule I don't repost surveys. I have once or twice, but usually I just read them, chuckle and move on.

Reading a recent survey sent to me I came across a question that stopped me.

"What celebrity would you like to beat up?"

I couldn't think of just one, so I decided to come up with a list.

1. Paris Hilton - Act like a hoe, get smacked like a hoe.
2. Sean Hannity - Shut the fuck up you mindless sheep.
3. Hillary Clinton - Power hungry socialists always get what's coming to them.
4. Terrel Owens - Quit your bitching and play football, you millionaire crybaby.
5. Chris Berman - If I break his jaw, he'll shut up for the rest of the season.

Feel free to comment, list your own, or add to it. This should be a fun game.

Going, Going, Gone!

Everything is confirmed, we're packing gear, the tour begins next week. I leave on, Tuesday the 24th for Bloomington, IN. From there up to Madison, WI and on, and on, and on...

If anyone wants to grab an adult beverage, get in touch with me, we'll do it Sunday while watching football somewhere with bad food and good liquor.

Work Related Rant

People astound me. A patient would never tell a surgeon how to operate. An end user wouldn't tell a programmer how to write code. Why is it that every douchebag with an M-Box thinks they're a sound engineer?

I run across this in my job all the time. Everyone thinks they know more than me, but interestingly enough, they don't work with or for me. All of their audio engineering knowledge is being put to good use making a latte for me at Starbucks and flipping my double with Cheeze at Wendy's.

Does anyone else run into this?

Politics As They Are

November is right around the corner. One cannot turn on the radio or t.v. without hearing the most recent ad for whatever candidate.

The campaign is the same all over the country.

REPUBLICAN: I'm ___(insert name here)___ and I approve this message. I'm a Christian conservative. I don't like minorities, blue collar workers, or poor people.

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus... ...America, America, America... ...Values, Values, Values.

Vote for me, nothing I'll do will actually benefit you, but at least I'm not a bleeding heart, left-wing pussy.

DEMOCRAT: I'm ___(insert name here)___ and I approve this message. The Republicans are ruining this country. Rich people are evil, they are the reason your life sucks.

Jobs, Jobs, Jobs... ...Economy, Economy, Economy... ...Health Care, Health Care, Health Care.

Vote for me, nothing I'll do will actually benefit you, but you'll think so while I raise your taxes and keep you suckling on the government teat.

Visit the Libertarian Party website

If you're tired of the same old shit, speak up. Say something.

TOUR!

The check came yesterday. I'm going on tour. The show is the "Fall College Caravan" featuring artists from Kanye West's label and Kenye West. Electronica, Metal, and Hip-Hop artists on multiple stages.

Here's the date info:

10/24/06 - Blomington, IN
10/26/06 - Green Bay, WI
10/27/06 - Green Bay, WI
10/30/06 - Louisville, KY
10/31/06 - Louisville, KY
11/02/06 - Knoxville, TN
11/03/06 - Knoxville, TN
11/06/06 - Charlottesville, VA
11/07/06 - Charlottesville, VA
11/09/06 - College Park, MD
11/10/06 - College Park, MD
11/13/06 - Columbus, OH
11/14/06 - Columbus, OH
11/16/06 - South Bend, IN
11/17/06 - South Bend, IN
11/20/06 - Akron, OH
11/21/06 - Akron, OH
11/23/06 - Buffalo, NY
11/24/06 - Buffalo, NY
11/27/06 - State College, PA
11/28/06 - State College, PA
11/29/06 - Philadelphia, PA
12/01/06 - Syracuse, NY
12/02/06 - Waterbury, CT
12/04/06 - Camden, NJ
12/05/06 - Syracuse, NY

I Love The Smell of Napalm in the Morning

North Korea has successfully tested a nuclear weapon.

What does this mean?

Soon we will have to again show the world that our dick is bigger than everyone else's. Once again we are going to have to flex some muscle to quiet down a little douchebag dictator that thinks his tiny little nuke and limited arsenal will somehow make us quiver.

The sad thing is, he's probably right.

North Korea is no match for us. They're testing? Our stuff works. They're small, we're huge. It's simple math. However, MSNBC is already writing editorials on how it's the United State's fault that North Korea is stepping up the nuclear game. It's only a matter of time before the rest of the networks jump on that bandwagon. Then the Clintons will start to mouth off, and Nancy Pelosi and her cronies are going to jump on the appeasement soapbox just in time for a major pole shift in November's election.

Don't believe the hype. This is nothing we haven't faced before. It isn't the end of the world, but it could be if the appeasement crowd gets their way.

Again With The Smoking

The whole state of Ohio, and probably the rest of the country for that matter is coming unglued. I go out to my mailbox today and what do I find? A few bills, a credit card application, and a flyer that has...

"IMPORTANT VOTER INFORMATION"

and an

"ABSENTEE BALLOT APPLICATION INSIDE!"

Before I even open this thing up I notice that it is paid for by:

Smoke Less Ohio Voter Education Fund
Matt Yuskewich, Treasurer
88 E. Broad St. Ste 1320
Columbus, OH 43215

Why put his info in this blog? So anyone who reads this knows who to go throw rocks at when his shitty, socialist bill actually passes.

My Stats. Smoker, Libertarian. A dangerous combination for these anti-smoking fuckwads.

This bill is designed for Ohioans to think "That ain't so bad" or "hey, it's not a total ban" and it will pass. What they want to do is ban smoking everywhere except bars and niteclubs. They think that it's a common sense solution to the smoking problem.

1. There is no problem. If you don't want to smoke, then don't. If you don't want to go into a business where smoking is permitted... don't. The marketplace will take care of itself and if non-smoking is popular enough, there won't be any more smoking.

2. Government intervention in private business is not acceptable EVER. At no time should we invite the government in to control more. Day by day, vote by vote, our freedoms are being stripped from us. Although a public smoking ban isn't horrible in and of itself, it's a contributing factor in the much larger problem of our lazy way of life. Lazy Americans will ruin America be asking the government to do more and more until they have total control.

The scariest part about this is they are using the latest scare tactic. Including an absentee application in the propaganda as if to say, "If you mail in your vote it's sure to be counted and by the way, vote with us on the smoking thing"

Americans are just stupid enough to do it. Common people, freedom isn't easy. It's work. If you understand this, there is hope. If not, it's too late.

Anybody Got a Lite

My friend Ralph had a "mild heart attack" today. He's only 38. That's not heart attack age. Now I'm thinking about my own mortality at 29 and the potential of dying way too young. It has me frightened.

So what do I do?

After I hear about his cardiac episode I go out to dinner. A ribeye, baked potato with all the goop on it, and a salad. I wash it all down with caffeinated iced tea. A nice after dinner smoke and after I finish this I'm going outside for another cigarette.

It's not the food that will kill me. It's the cigarettes. I smoke too fucking many cigarettes. I know this. I know they're bad for me. They are also a necessity. Cigarettes relieve stress and anxiety.

So there is the conundrum. Health or Happiness?

For now I choose happiness, but I think I'm cutting back on my intake. I'll wean myself from the teat of the R.J. Reynold's corporation slowly, but since I'm a frugal guy who hates to see things wasted, I'll wait until this pack is gone. Waste not, want not...

Eating Out With Class

My friend Damon posted a bulletin that touched on this subject, but bulletins lack originality. Here's some tips and tricks to avoid getting a meal at your favorite establishment without having your food cross the path of a server's asshole or nutsack before arriving at your table.

1. Servers are not servants. Be nice to the folks handling your food. "Please" and "Thank-You" are a good way of making sure there is no snot in your gravy. No one wants to hear "Gimme" or "I want" that. It's just rude.

2. The odds of someone else's hair getting in your food are slim to none. The hair in your salad is yours. Deal with it.

3. If your food is over or under cooked, it isn't the server's fault. It's the cook's. Taking it out on the server will do nothing but cause the server to drag their ass in serving you and drag your extra rolls across their ass in retaliation.

4. Don't haggle over the cost over a meal. If you didn't want to pay for eating out you should have stayed home.

5. Your kids aren't cute. They aren't adorable. They are making a mess that someone else had to clean up. Keep them under control.

These are not necessarily rules, more like guidelines. If you follow them your dining will be poop and snot free. Bon Appetite.

White Girls

I want to know the name of the person responsible for bad dancing by white chicks in clubs. Who came up with all the lame line dances that white chicks seem to gravitate toward?

You know what I'm talking about. Picture yourself in a club. You have an adult beverage in hand, you're talking amongst friends and then "Booty Call" starts to play. All the white chick, zombies make to the dance floor with the quickness and begin to line dance with a slack-jawed blank stare on their faces. The music goes into the "Cleveland Shuffle" and a few others that I can't recall. All the while some variation of the "Electric Slide (which is another fucking line dance)" is being wiggled to badly by dudes in their chairs looking at the zombie girls lined up. It's like a cattle auction.

When other dance music is played, they return to their adult beverages and wait for the next zombie dance song to be played, or worse they RErequest the songs that were just played.

I just don't get it. Why is unoriginal style and follow the leader all the rage? Why is is fashionable to be a sheep? Why can't white people dance? Why? Why? Why?

Just Read it Already

I'm tired of bitching about the stupidity I see every day. Trust me I encounter some of the dumbest motherfuckers you would ever have the displeasure of meeting. My problem is that the more I notice it the less I notice anything else. It's like playing slugbug at a Volkswagon dealer. It just gets boring after a while.

So I search around and I read my friend's blogs. I read other site's blogs and then I read my own. I used to think I had some good stuff, but then I discovered there are people who write blogs about masturbating with a G.I. Joe doll crammed up their ass and they get thousands of reads per day. What the fuck is that? I guess I'm jealous. Jealous of their numbers, Jealous of their wit, Jealous that I don't have a G.I. Joe doll... ...whatever.

So what should I write about to be more edgy? Sex of course. Therein lies the problem. I really don't care. I enjoy it. I like to think I'm good at it. I hope you all do and are as well, but I really don't care who, what, when, where, why and how you fuck. It's not my thing. If you have something exciting like an orgy with midget triplets while having hot wax dripped on your nipples lying on a bed of pinecones I might be a little more interested, but who wouldn't? Really...

Of course you know that someone will do something to piss me off soon enough and we'll forget all about midget orgys (I think that's how it's spelled). At least for a while.

Networking

My lovely friend Allie has had one of her blogs receive a review. (a good one, I might add) Click here to read the review.

Since I'm such a great guy and I have a small but mighty list of readers, I'm sending you my minions over to Allie's BLOG and to her myspace. The rules are simple, since her blogs are better than mine, read them, but don't neglect the guy who sent you there!

Cheers.

Football

I just finished watching the Bengals / Steelers game. It was a great game. Both quarterbacks looked like shit, but the defenses were on fire. It pains me to say it, but the Bengals are the best team in the NFL as of today. Fucking Hell!!! The only negative from the game, aside from the outcome was the Steelers getting penalized twice for the dumbest rule in he NFL.. Taunting. A 15 yard personal foul. What the hell is that?

There's no crying in football. Who came up with this stupid rule? It isn't curling or golf. It isn't cricket or polo. Football isn't a gentleman's game. The NFL is trying to create a false image of the players and their "sportsmanship" Folks this is football. This is a sport where the objective of a defense it to slam the other team, specifically the guy holding the ball into the ground. There is hitting, pushing, shoving, cussing, spitting, sweating and all sorts of unrefined testosterone filled madness . Along with that comes the opportunity to cheer your team on and/or hype yourself. Taunting and celebrating are parts of the game. Whoever came up with that rule obviously never did anything good enough to be able to rub it in the face of their competition. I say we should encourage taunting, end zone celebrations, and all other forms of hype.

Oh yeah, note to Steve and Ralph... My fantasy team is undefeated and ya'll just plain suck.

Dance... dance... wiggle... middle finger... crowd wave

Taunting. E-Rock. 15 yard penalty. 1st Down.

I'll still win.

Piss Off.

1 Year?

It's weird. My 1st anniversary was Monday, but since we've actually been together for almost 7 and known each other for over 10 years it didn't seem to have that 1st anniversary magic.

Not in a bad way, in a comfortable I'm glad we waited way.

We didn't have to spend the first year of marriage trying to figure out if we could stand living with each other, we figured that out long ago. (I'm still not sure about it, though... she snores)

All in all things are good. I have a wonderful friend, lover, and partner in my wife. She puts up with all of my shit with little or no complaint. She encourages me and backs me up. She's good in the sack and she can cook! Who could ask for anything more?

I hope there are many more years to come.

Cool Stuff

So as not to jinx it I won't go into detail, but there is something quite cool, new, exciting and fun coming up for me in about a month. As soon as things are finalized and I know it's going to happen I'll spill the beans.

For now you'll have to wait with baited breath like I am. Cheers.

Aging

I'm getting older. I'm not wrinkling, I still have all of the hair on my head and none in my ears. I don't need a prostate exam and fiber supplements. It's the initial stages of aging. All of the physical aspects of youth still exist, but the psychological and emotional aspects of middle age begin to creep in.

I'm the kind of guy that is not offended or shocked by anything. Recently my ethics and integrity have been tested for the first time. I'm normally the guy of questionable morality and ethics, but those have tightened little by little. I think that it's part of the aging process. Something happens on or about thirty that sneaks up and bites. I can't explain it, but I'm sure it's an improvement.

9/11

I was trying to keep my mouth shut yesterday. I woke up knowing what day it was and avoided the television and radio because I knew I'd end up pissed off.

ENOUGH ALREADY WITH THE SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH BULLSHIT!

IT HAPPENED. IT'S OVER. DEAL WITH IT.

When did Americans become a nation of over emotionalized sappy little pussies? What happened to the violent anger the country felt on September 12, 2006? What happened to righting the wrongs and getting the terrorists?

Now it's all about memorializing and immortalizing the victims of the attacks. Yes, they are victims. Yes, they were innocents. Yes, it was a horrible tragedy.

BUT!!!!!

A little over 3000 people died that day. According to the U.S. census bureau the population of the U.S. is 295,734,134. There is NO WAY IN HELL that almost 3 hundred million people are directly connected to 3000. The math isn't there. The mourning is almost a cancer. It grows and grows just because it can.

People in Juneau, Alaska are having remembrances and ceremonies because someone's father's, brother's, nephew's, uncle's, sister's, cousin's, aunt's, former roommate once looked out of the sky lobby window of the south tower six months before the attack. How is that constructive?

The families of the victims have my condolences and my sympathy, but some pig farmer in Lincoln, Nebraska that actually thinks "It coulda happened anywhere", is full of pig shit. Not everyone is a victim

That's the new American mentality. Everyone play the victim. Everybody get in a big group hug and cry about how the evils of the world have wronged us. People need to get over themselves. Guess what? People out there don't like us. They don't like our way of life. They are going to try and convert or kill us at every opportunity. I for one will not live in fear. I will not allow them to terrorize me. No self respecting American should either. Think about it.

Can You Spare Some Change?

Can I get some spare change?????

I just returned from Las Vegas, as you know from my last missive. In Vegas, nearly everyone gets tipped. A gratuity is part of the normal compensation for most of the services offered.

$1 per bag if someone handles or carries them.

$2 per drink.

5% to the dealer for a winning hand.

$1 to the valet.

20% to your waitress.

The list goes on and on.

Where are there no tips, you may ask. Places like Starbucks, McDonalds (or any other fast food joint), retail outlets, or places where the employees are not traditionally tipped.

So why is it that the chick at Dairy Queen near my house has a tip jar by the register? It's not just DQ, it's everywhere. Wherever I go I see a tip jar where the "need a penny" try used to be. When did being a register jockey merit tipping? A tip is a gratuity for a service, the chick that took my order and money and then told someone else to make my meal didn't do anything to merit a tip. I'd rather give money to a bum or a crackhead.

The bums and crackheads are asking for money legitimately, the counter girl is trying to guilt tips out of foolish customers. Not me. Lately I've been an asshole. I use the tip jar to make exact change. If something costs me $5.79, guess where I get my $0.79? You got it. I'm doing my part to put the lazy American worker is his or her place.

Advice.... If you want a job that receives tips, go wait tables or tend bar. If you want to be a register jockey; then accept your hourly wage and deal with your poor career choices.

Perhaps I'll put a tip jar on the console at my next gig. Whhttp://www.blogger.com/post-create.g?blogID=35548832#ere do you think that would get me?

Las Vegas and The Department of Homeland Security

Man I needed a vacation. A week in Vegas will clear one's head I highly recommend it. Take money with you, partying like a rock star gets pricy.

Getting to Vegas is a pain in the ass.

The Department of Homeland security is an organization that was established to protect us, the good citizens from the evils of terrorism and to keep our nation safe. (note the sarcasm) They have enacted laws to prevent terrorism that have no hope of preventing anything. Those laws exist solely so the thongs of soulless morons that follow the government blindly can sleep securely knowing that some idiot on an authority trip is inspecting my luggage so I can't hijack an airplane with a lighter and a Diet Coke.

I'll admit, on the way OUT to Vegas things were entirely my fault.

I forgot I had my lighter in my man purse. As you may surmise, I was detained, my purse rummaged through searched and left without a lighter for the remainder of the day. I came to discover that I could have had a whole box of matches, but no bic.

I was annoyed, but not pissed. I was hoping beyond hope that there was a Cinnabon in the airport and my frustration would melt away amongst the pecans and frosting.

There was NO FUCKING CINNABON THE COLUMBUS, OH AIRPORT (CMH). What kind of podunk operation doesnt have a Cinnabon in their airport? I fly semi frequently and have never not had one. But I've never flown out of Columbus, OH. I never will again that's for damn sure.

CMH to MSP (Minneapolis / St. Paul)

MSP is quite a nice airport. Here's the best thing about them... they have many points of entry through security. That means no lines. Even though the lines are mostly non-existent, let me give you some simple advice in the airport security lines.

1. Take your shoes off before you get to the conveyor belt. Even though there will never be another shoe bomb the Government has to chase it's tail and inconvenience us, so help your neighbor out and don't take longer than necessary.

2. Take EVERYTHING out of your pockets and put it into your carry-on whatever. Ladies I know you carry purses, fellas, get a man purse. It's fashionable and useful. With nothing in your pockets, theoretically there will be no beep-beep at the detector and the line can go faster.

3. If you buy a souvenir that may have the most remote of chances to be misconstrued as something contraband, UPS it home or check it with your other luggage. Don't try and bring it on the plane. It's always a hassle.

4. Smokers (like me) get some matches. Also get some gum. Chances are you have to go outside, past security to smoke then you have to repeat the frisking to get back in.

MSP to LAS (Las Vegas)

A very non, eventful flight...

On the return trip...

LAS to IAH (Houston)

Leaving Las Vegas, I followed ALL of the rules. I had nothing in my pockets, hat off, belt off, shoes off, no lighter, no matches, no nothing in my pockets, just a man purse with a book, 2 cookies and an extra shirt for when we landed.

I know enough to keep my hatred of the government silenced in an airport because the first amendment has been suspended there. However as I walk through the detector I hear the horrible beep-beep.

I'm asked if I have any metal on me. I lift my shirt to show no belt, zipper, or anything.

I walk through again... beep-beep.

ME - "oh fuck"

TSA ASSHOLE - "will you step over here, sir?"

ME- "do I have a choice?"

TSA ASSHOLE - "no"

ME - "then I guess I'll step over there, then.

I step into this glass cage with footprints on the floor and a chair in the corner. I sit on the chair as commanded and lift my feet for inspection. Then I stand on the footprints arms out DaVinci style palms up and the wanding begins.

TSA ASSHOLE - "so how was your stay in Vegas"

ME - "Great until now"

TSA ASSHOLE - "why is that"

ME - "why do you think, moron? Do I look like the 'type'"

meanwhile the wand nears that area between my bellybutton and my dick and the wand goes off again.

TSA ASSHOLE - "I'm asking again if you have any metal?"

ME - "I'm telling you again, NO, but that's not the answer you're looking for is it?"

TSA ASSHOLE - "I'm doing my job sir."

ME - "Well, your job sucks."

The wand beeps again.

I'm given instructions on how to drop trou and prep myself for frisking.

FRISKING?!?! This guy fondled my sack like he was checking produce. If I wasn't straight and pissed off, I would have been aroused by it. He then proceded to check my crack, armpits, and hair for anything. Then the wand again. NO BEEP.

Thank God, the next step was an anal probe I'm sure.

TSA ASSHOLE - "You're free to go sir"

ME - "You mean I have my rights back?"

TSA ASSHOLE - "Have a nice flight."

ME - "Go fuck yourself."

After all of that, it was either a malfunctioning security device or some government fuckwad playing dirty pool. See what I mean? No security, just an opportunity to take freedom away a little at a time all the while the majority of the moronic populous thinks that we are more secure.

So I'm in the airport and my friend Moe calls me about a gig coming up. The venue has a crappy P.A. but that's not the focus. As we were discussing the P.A. requirements for the artist, I mentioned the speakers.

ME - "Did you blow 'em up"

The rest of the conversation isn't important now. I just said, "blow 'em up" in an airport without thinking. Oops.

I look around me and every eye within earshot is on me, staring.

ME - "Speakers, I was talking about speakers"

Then the loudspeaker above my head announces my plane being boarded. I quickly yet casually board my aircraft, shaking in fear that I'm going to be detained for talking about work. I finally relax when the plane is in the air.

Other than that, my vacation was awesome. Lots of booze, gambling, eating, being lazy, spending money, all things that make life good. I just wish that the government hadn't put such an ugly mark on the end of it.

It's About Time...

Finally the Government has done it's job and upheld the Constitution. Believe me, I can't stand the Islamofacism that has perpetrated the horrible condition that the world finds itself in, but I still can't fathom why Comerade Bush would actually think that his Marxist domestic surveilance tactics would actually hold up.

Normally I can't stand the ACLU, but every now and again they actually defend Civil Liberties and lobby to protect the people. This is one of those times.

----

This is the story that was posted to Yahoo! News 30 minutes ago.

DETROIT - A federal judge ruled Thursday that the government's warrantless surveillance program is unconstitutional and ordered an immediate halt to it. ..

U.S. District Judge Anna Diggs Taylor in Detroit became the first judge to strike down the National Security Agency's program, which she says violates the rights to free speech and privacy as well as the separation of powers enshrined in the Constitution.

"Plaintiffs have prevailed, and the public interest is clear, in this matter. It is the upholding of our Constitution," Taylor wrote in her 43-page opinion.

The Justice Department appealed the ruling and issued a statement calling the program "an essential tool for the intelligence community in the war on terror."

White House press secretary Tony Snow said the Bush administration "couldn't disagree more with this ruling."

"United States intelligence officials have confirmed that the program has helped stop terrorist attacks and saved American lives," he said. "The program is carefully administered and only targets international phone calls coming into or out of the United States where one of the parties on the call is a suspected al-Qaida or affiliated terrorist."

The ruling won't take immediate effect so Taylor can hear a Justice request for a stay pending its appeal. A hearing on the motion was set for Sept. 7, Snow said.

The ACLU filed the lawsuit on behalf of journalists, scholars and lawyers who say the program has made it difficult for them to do their jobs. They believe many of their overseas contacts are likely targets of the program, monitoring phone calls and e-mails between people in the U.S. and people in other countries when a link to terrorism is suspected.

The government argued that the program is well within the president's authority, but said proving that would require revealing state secrets.

The ACLU said the state-secrets argument was irrelevant because the Bush administration already had publicly revealed enough information about the program for Taylor to rule.

"At its core, today's ruling addresses the abuse of presidential power and reaffirms the system of checks and balances that's necessary to our democracy," ACLU executive director Anthony Romero told reporters after the ruling.

He called the opinion "another nail in the coffin in the Bush administration's legal strategy in the war on terror."

While siding with the ACLU on the surveillance issue, Taylor dismissed a separate claim by the group over NSA data-mining of phone records. She said not enough had been publicly revealed about that program to support the claim and further litigation would jeopardize state secrets.

The lawsuit alleged that the NSA "uses artificial intelligence aids to search for keywords and analyze patterns in millions of communications at any given time." Multiple lawsuits have been filed related to data-mining against phone companies, accusing them of improperly turning over records to the NSA.

However, the data-mining was only a small part of the Detroit suit, said Ann Beeson, the ACLU's associate legal director and the lead attorney on the case.

Beeson predicted the government would appeal the wiretapping ruling and request that the order to halt the program be postponed while the case makes its way through the system. She said the ACLU had not yet decided whether it would oppose such a postponement

Republicans, Metal and Satan

The good people of the state of Ohio saw fit to execute another killer this morning. The guy was an asshole and a smackhead. He Stabbed and mutilated 2 old people, and ultimately got what he deserved. I am 1000 percent in favor of the death penalty, I just think that the government better be 10,000 percent sure the convicted is ACTUALLY guilty.

This schmuck was.

On with the story. This is the news coverage

Darrell Wayne "Gator" Ferguson's mother prayed a Christian prayer for his soul as Ferguson gave a Satanic salute with two fingers while he lay on the gurney before he was executed by lethal injection Tuesday morning.

Ferguson, 28, of Dayton was the fourth inmate executed in Ohio this year and the youngest person executed in Ohio in 44 years. He was pronounced dead at 10:21 a.m.

The triple murderer and Satanist's last statement focused on his family: "Mom and Dad, I love you both. I love you a lot and I wish you all the best." Wearing a white shirt, blue pants and dark-rimmed glasses, he looked straight up in the execution chamber.

When she first came into the witness room, his mother, Donna Davis, held hands and prayed with Ferguson's father, Clarence Vela, and stepfather Paul Yates. As she watched him on television before he came into the execution chamber, she said, "He's ready and I'm happy for him. No more chains, baby, no more handcuffs. It's done."

The victims' witnesses said nothing throughout. Although Davis' crying was audible, the others held hands and were quiet throughout. Later, Davis said, "Forgive them, for they know not what they do, and he didn't know what he was doing."

Just before the curtain closed for the coroner to pronounce him dead, Donna Davis said twice, "I rebuke you, Satan, in the name of Jesus.

"Satan, you weren't as strong as you thought you were. All you did was make people suffer like you like to do. But you didn't get him. You didn't have the power to get him. Thank you, heavenly Father."

In 2001, Ferguson, a drug addict on Christmas leave from a rehabilitation center, killed three elderly or disabled East Dayton residents while robbing them for drug money. He has reveled in the evil of his acts, saying it thrilled him to stab, stomp and beat his victims.

Monday evening, Ferguson laughed and cried with his family, then stayed up all night talking to his executioners.

The visit (with family) was sometimes emotional there were some tears shed, some laughter," Ohio prisons spokeswoman Andrea Dean said. "They talked about his childhood, his decision to move forward with the execution."

Ferguson ate his entire "special meal" of three T-bone steaks, two breaded chicken breasts and chocolate ice cream, also downing some cherry pie during the night, Dean said.

He went to bed Monday at 8:57 p.m., but woke up 18 minutes later and spent the night talking to the execution team, drinking Mountain Dew and smoking Marlboros. He talked about music, sports, life on death row, his family and his decision to wave his appeals, Dean said.

Ferguson also talked about other inmates who have been executed, particularly Rocky Barton of Waynesville, who was put to death July 12 for murdering his wife. Ferguson knew Barton slightly from death row.

He slept from 4:43 to 5:22 Tuesday morning, then showered and had a final visit through cell bars with his mother, father and stepfathers Gary Davis and Yates.

----
Satanic Sign? Do you think it looked like this?

The "metal" sign. Was originated by Ronnie James Dio in the early 80's.

The press likes to have a scapegoat. Metal = Satan = Ratings. But I can throw a wrench into it. Dig these beauties.

Like Father Like Daughter. Is the Bush family a bunch of devil worshippers or metalheads or Longhorns Fans. Just checking.

Medical Terrorism

I'm afraid to watch T.V. Every commercial break is loaded with medicines I need to ask my doctor about in case I just might have a tapeworm causing allergies that end up giving me erectile dysfunction.

Do you breathe? You might need this pill.

Do you live in the United States? You might need this new wonder elixir.

It's fucking insanity. When did we become so infatuated with medical problems. Society has survived calamity after calamity for millenia without super drugs to help them along the way. If a plant or animal made us sick, we stayed away from it. If we couldn't get it up, we didn't fuck. If we had high cholesterol, we died from our poor diet choices. The list goes on and on...

Now all the responsibility of life has been eliminated. Do what you like, there's a pill to fix it.

I have a theory that half the reason that people are getting sicker and sicker is that there are so many drugs available that the human body doesn't have the time or ability to immunize itself properly. We're a nation of addicts and the drugs aren't even fun.

...except the hard-on medication, that may be fun. However I feel sorry for the 80 year old wives who were SOOOO looking forward to the day when their husbands couldn't get it up anymore. There isn't a new drug to cure that. They just need to smoke pot and drink a lot to numb themselves.

Another Tale of Stupid People

On my way to the 'Natti to play some golf yesterday, I ran into traffic. I don't get too pissed since it's the A.M. rush and these suckers are running to work and I'm cruising to play golf.

Thinking that it's probably something stupid like merging traffic or something serious like a horrible accident where one can't discern flesh from metal in the mangled wreck, I proceed with caution.

I was wrong on both accounts. Someone was driving a little too fast and the police noticed. A chase ensued resulting in the offender being pulled over and issued a citation for speeding. This would cause traffic problems if the speeder didn't pull all the way over and blocked a lane, but this wasn't the case. He was half on the emergency lane and half on the grass. There was a good 10 feet between him and I-75.

Traffic was at a stand still. I thought I was in another country. A country where no one had received a speeding ticket so they were curious to see what happened. That had to have been the case because why else would traffic slow down to a crawl around a ticket?

A TICKET! Not a bloody mess, not a DUI, none of the above, A FUCKING SPEEDING TICKET. My golf was delayed because people are such assholes that they have to gawk at some dickhead getting a SPEEDING TICKET. People are so stupid, it's amazing they remember how to breathe.

People / Fire The Government

people
-----
I don't understand something. Why is it that people use their blogs to post stupid, hokey song lyrics they they think are somehow meaningful and poignant?

We have this medium at our disposal to fill with our innermost thoughts, perhaps some thought provoking commentary or even some light-hearted prose or original poetry to express ourselves, but no... people put the shitty number one song of the week up as if it was written just for them and has some kind of meaning to their mundane suburban lives.

People are so fucking pathetic.

-----
Fire the government

Scary news from the enemies of freedom i.e. your government.

check out this article.

While most of the country is pining over useless pieces of desert teeming with useless desert people going through man made hell, young Abraham and his parents have had their rights stripped from them. They live RIGHT HERE. They are not foreigners, they are U.S. Citizens. How can anyone think we live in a free society?

There is no freedom, there is only the illusion of freedom. If the government tells Abraham what kind of treatment he is and isn't allowed to have for his cancer, and labels his parents guilty of abuse by neglect for supporting his decision to persue alternative treatment; what is next? That isn't just governmental interference in our lives, it's governmental interference in how our lives can continue and for how long.

If Abraham dies, God forbid, I have an idea. On his certificate, list the official cause of death as "The U.S. Government".

These people must be stopped. This was not the concept that our founders had, this is Socialism at it's core and we are falling apart.

Weekend Fun?

This past weekend My wife and I went to Paramount's Kings Island (PKI) with Jericho and Hope. The park was empty! No waits on anything (except the indoor rides with air conditioning) and it was a great time.

HOWEVER... I'm elated that Cedar Fair has bought Kings Island from Paramount. The park hasn't been right since Paramount bought it. Paramount renamed all the rides after movies and gave the park a stupid theme. The staff is so lazy they can't even give a thumbs up for ride safety checks. It's just a lazy fist hung in the air. The classic rides are in terrible need of paint and general sprucing up because Paramount focuses on the side games and adventures that are additional cost instead of the rides that are the main attraction. Generally the great amusement park I remember from years ago is gone and a corporate money pit has grown in it's place. It is sad, very sad.

Hopefully the good people at Cedar Fair can return Kings Island to it's former glory.

Pimp Credentials

I know I'm some kinda wonderful, but where did all these friend requests from porn chicks come from? 99 percent of my friends list are people I actually know or have worked with, and to date I have not worked in porn.

I get about 10 requests a day and although I appreciate the confidence booster, I'm married. My Mrs. would not appreciate the hot little porn starlets and so I deny them. It's annoying. On one hand I understand the business aspect of fishing for leads, but on the other I wonder what makes me look like a mark for the internet porn market.

I'm not against porn, in fact I'm in favor of it. I just don't partake because my Mrs. has requested that I abstain. I guess it's like any addiction, it's hard to stay clean when everyone around you is doing it. There should be meetings.....

[me] Hi. I'm E-Rock and I'm a porn-o-holic. It's been 4 years since my last indulgence.

[group] Hi. E-Rock

[me] I don't have any stories to tell, I just wanted it to be known that I don't don't watch porn, it's just an internet scam.

[group] Denial E-Rock, own up to it.

[me] No, really - no porn for me.

See... this is the problem, the appearance of impropriety is often enough to convict, so please... STOP WITH THE REQUESTS FROM PORN CHICKS.

Independence Day

(transposed yet edited from Neal Boortz)
The 4th celebrates not only freedom, but independence from an oppressive government. For seven long years following July 4, 1776, an unbelievably courageous and determined minority of colonists fought to achieve our independence from England. That's right ... a minority. At no time during our Revolutionary War did the majority of colonists support the cause of independence. If CNN, ABC, The New York Times, and other agencies had been around to do their polling back then we would undoubtedly have been faced with a barrage of weekly poll results showing a lack of public support for the war. Loyalists would be demanding an exit strategy. Newspapers would be editorializing for negotiations and troop withdrawals. There would be feature stories on the news every night about families left behind to take care of the family farms while husbands and brothers were off fighting this unwinnable war.

Thank God we didn't have television during the Revolutionary War. It certainly wouldn't have ended the way it did.

But ... back to this independence thing. July 4th is known as Independence Day. Independence from what? Independence from the government of Great Britain, that's what.

Now, in 2006, Americans are far more dependent on and oppressed by the Imperial Federal Government of the United States than they ever were by Great Britain. The level of taxation is higher, and the level of government interference in our daily life exceeds anything the colonists ever saw. In spite of all this, Americans will be waving flags, watching parades, going on picnics, and gawking at fireworks today, all in celebration of their love of freedom.
Love of freedom, my ass. This isn't a celebration of freedom, this is a celebration of hypocrites.

Let me just ask you if you will do something. I want you to write a letter to your congressman and your senators. I want you to tell them that you really got to thinking while watching people working on their melanomas on the beech, and you want the government to do something for you. You want the government to cut you loose.

Tell your congressman that you want to be free to establish your own relationship with your employer. No minimum wages. No mandated benefits. You want to negotiate your own employment contract with your employer, and the only thing you want the government to do is to help you enforce it through the courts if your boss starts screwing around.

Tell your elected officials that you do not believe that you have a right to health care. Tell them that you do not wish to use the police power of government to force someone else to provide you with medications or medical services. Write that you are perfectly willing to assume the total and complete responsibility for acquiring your own health insurance, all you want them to do is eliminate the mandates and allow you to shop for just the coverage you desire. Be sure to add that in the event you get sick without insurance, or you can't cover the costs, you absolutely do not want the government to step in and spend one dime of someone else's money on your care.

Tell them that you want an end to Social Security. You want out. You will be responsible for setting up your retirement plan and you will be willing to suffer the consequences in old age if you fail to do so. Tell your representatives that in a free society the government shouldn't take money from people who are now working just to give it to people who are not.

Maybe you will want to tell your senators and congressman that you have no interest what other people do in the privacy of their own homes. You don't want any laws that regulate their sexual conduct, and you don't want them punished if they sit out in the back yard under the stars at night puffing on some marijuana.

Inform your representatives that you want to be free to make your own consumer choices, and that includes choices of which professional you want to use for medical and legal services. Tell them that you are perfectly willing to rely on your own judgment, or the judgment of private accrediting agencies when it comes to selecting an attorney or a doctor. You might add that you don't like the idea that you have to go to the government to ask who may and who may not clip your fingernails.

When you have written that letter ... then you can go out and proclaim your love of freedom.

Drag Queens

Drag queens are funny. Trust me on this, I just did sound for the Pride Day celebration in Dayton over the weekend.

I'm not being judgmental here, but I'm eternally thankful that I'm not gay. I couldn't pull off the "fabulous" clothes, being a catty little bitch or dancing with my hands in the air. Although I must admit, the gay guys seem to have a lot more fun than the straight ones.

Confession

During my formative years, I tested every boundary, pushed every limit and questioned every standard... moral or otherwise. I offended everyone more often than not.

I'm making no apologies here, however as I meet more people from my youth, I am thankful that they either don't remember the things I do, or have grown past them. Time actually is a wonderful healer.

There is a very small handful of people that will know who they are if they read this; they should know that there are things I regret. Maybe someday we can sit down together open a bottle and laugh about the stupid things I did long ago.

An Answer to a Friend

My friend, Misty posted a blog that ended with the question: Do we have to give up the person God has helped us come to be, to become the person Christians think we should be?

She's my friend and I dig her, but this is a stupid question. The easy answer is NO, but the first half raises an eyebrow. Did God really help anyone become anyone?

If someone scored a touchdown then kneels and prayed to thank God, did he really help him score? Does God watch football?

If someone becomes a bigillionaire and thanks God, was it God's fault and not the wise investments or lottery that got them the bigillions?

Did God make crackhead Phil into a crackhead?

God is an easy excuse. If he exists, (statistically there is a 54 percent chance that he does) why would he single out individuals for success and/or failure? The answer is he wouldn't.

As small children we are indoctrinated with some bastardized version of a religion that keeps growing farther and farther from the original focus to the point where it has become an excuse for judgementalism and bad behavior.

A perfect example is Fred Phelps and his whole whack job family that stage "Christian" demonstrations outside the funerals of fallen soldiers because they actually believe that God is allowing our soldiers to be killed to teach us a lesson about homosexuality.

Christianity is WAY too convenient. You can fuck up all you want to, say you're sorry, and all is forgiven? How quaint, and what an excuse for bad behavior. If you actually believe that the world was condemned to hell for all eternity until Christ paid the price for everybody, then every breath should be in thanks and awe for lifting such a heavy burden. We all know that NO ONE does or is even capable of that.

Why?

Because most Christians are only "good Christians" when it's convenient. Living according to Christ's teachings is hard stuff. Turning the other cheek never happens. Loving one's neighbor never happens. Christ didn't condemn and judge others he just loved them.

Misty, you should be proud of yourself and your accomplishments. You should continue down the path YOU have chosen. If you choose to believe in God, then do so and do it well. Just don't buy into all the shit that his followers will force-feed you. "Hate the sin, love the sinner" is one of the biggest pieces of bullshit that they can give you. In Christianity there is no room for hate.

Use your logical mind. If there is a God, it makes sense that he is capable of a compassion that we cannot possibly comprehend. As long as you don't go out of your way to make him look like an asshole then you're doing better than the throngs of mindless followers that go around hating gays, and casting judgment to make up for their own transgressions.

Shitty Music is Taking Over

Where in the hell did this psuedo rock crap come from? It's making a fuck ton of money from the one demographic with 100% disposable income. Kids. The bands suck, the lyrical content is predictable and canned, the shows are lackluster and these dumb ass kids LOVE IT.

Another bunch of geniuses, the rap/hip hoppers. I worked a show for the 36 Mafia last weekend. The same as Lil' Scrappy and Juvenile, the shows start WAAAAY late and "plays" for 30 minutes and leaves. The songs are incomplete and every one ends with the same gunshot sample in rapid fire.

I suppose I shouldn't complain because the rappers pay more than the rock/metal bands, and they ask no questions about production. Why? They don't know anything about the production end of this business. That's almost better to me than some band guy that knows just enough to be dangerous or annoying.

The music business is funny. If you're an adorably cute boy that sings and plays guitar badly, you're in. If you can pull of the thug/ghetto image just right, you're in. As long as you present the image that they want to sell, you're in. Talent is unnecessary. The company will find you a band, and I'll make sure that it doesn't sound like you suck.

Crackheads

A few weeks ago I was in and out of the shop at odd hours packing gear and unpacking gear. I left for a rave that I was doing sound for around 4:00 pm, and everything was normal. I returned from the rave around 8:00 am and there was a trail of wrappers leading from a small unit in the warehouse to the vending machine where the shattered glass from the front was all that was left.

It turns out that the unit was rented out to some useless crackhead for minimum money. This jackass broke into the vending machine and stole all the candy, leaving a trail right to him. Needless to say, he was arrested and evicted.

Fast forward to the now. I just looked out the door and saw the exact same guy hanging out on the dock at the back of the building. THAT IS BALLS! Either that... ...or the crack has totally fucked his mind out of any common sense. The dock is attached to the vending guy's unit and he wasn't at all happy that his machine was destroyed.

I wonder what it's like to go through life that stupid.

Opening Day!!!

I love the Cubs, and as of right now the Cubs are leading 12-6 in the 7th inning of opening day in Cincinnati.

The best part of this game, the jackass Reds fans. Reds fans are undoubtedly the WORST fans in the game. They love their team as long as they are winning, but the minute they start to lose, they leave the stadium, bitch about everything, curse their team and call talk radio stations to bitch about how lousy the Reds are and how much better they could do as manager.

This game isn't even over. The Great American Ballpark is 1/3rd empty and the Reds fan grumbling is audible over the fan mic from the booth.

I have nothing against the Reds, but their fans are assholes and sore losers! Fuck you all.

On to New Business

Watching the Game, one of the highlights was President Bush throwing out the first pitch. The cameras followed the President as went through the clubhouses and met with Reds and Cubs players. As he met Dusty Baker, he said "This is your year, right?"

This is just great. As if we didn't have enough to deal with, i.e. the Billy Goat, the Bartman Ball, and the general bad luck late in the season, now comes the Bush curse. Damn, Damn, Damn!!!!!

Go Cubs!!!!!!!!!!

Fat People

Let me qualify the title. I'm a big boy. 6'2" 275 lbs. I have a gut and I am working to lose it. So the upcoming rant includes me, but only on a strict medical definition of obesity.

I saw several shows on TLC and Discovery health this past week. One was called "The 750 Pound Man", one was called "The Half Ton Woman", and there were a few others that I can't recall the title. These shows were documentaries on the plight of people so fucking fat that they have not left their beds, let alone their homes in 10 or more years.

I looked at my gut and got disgusted. I began a diet and exercise program to get rid of it. Don't even think of the health problems that go along with being my size, I don't like the aesthetics of it. I don't like looking at the chubby gut, I don't like wearing layers of shirts to make sure my ass crack stays hidden. These fucking people either wear bed sheets sewn together or just go naked. Where does the brain just ignore the blindingly obvious?

They are trying to sell two ideas on where this obesity comes from.

Idea 1. There is a fat gene. -- BULLSHIT. There is no such monster. The human body is a surviving vessel. The body is not designed to be that large or that stagnant, and the ensuing health problems are evidence to that.

Idea 2. Food addiction is a disease akin to alcoholism or drug addiction. -- Again I say BULLSHIT. Stop eating. Actually I'll take a side bar here... to all the alcoholics and addicts out there, it's not a disease; you're just a weak-minded fool. If it's a problem for you, then fucking STOP. It's not a disease, it's a weakness and weakness can be worked out.

Here's the truth that I have concluded.

Our culture breeds laziness, gluttony and excess, and people that succumb to the temptation of a life of laziness are destined to die young, fat and unhealthy.

As I said, I am not exempt from this, however I am taking steps to remedy the situation, not piss and moan about my plight or blame anyone but myself.

--- Here's another fat pet peeve of mine. -- If you can't fit into the clothes, then find something else. The "muffin top" isn't sexy it's fat. Guys, if your gut hangs over, then wear a baggy shirt and vertical stripes or something. Just because Paris Hilton or Brad Pitt can wear it, does not mean your fat ass can pull it off.

Haircut

I cut 18" off my head today. More to come.

OK... 3 days later, I'm still trying to grab and play with my non existent hair off and on during the day. I like the new cut, even though it's sort of "boy bandish", however I feel like I've lost my metal. Now I'm just a nice respectable young man.

...at least until you speak to me.

Pictures are forthcoming.

English

Ok, here's a simple question. What is the difference between "there, their, and they're?"

Next question, what is the difference between "your, and you're?"

The answers lie within the basic rules of the English language that we ALL took many a year ago in elementary school. Some of the online writings I've read are being written by current students that don't know how to use the language we've all agreed upon.

This is sad. This is VERY sad. Are we a nation of idiots or just too fucking lazy to care? Neither of those options is acceptable. Show a little pride and intelligence and take the extra nanosecond of thought that it takes to not look like a total idiot.

Update on E-Rock

Losing weight is a lot harder than I thought, but progress is apparent. I'm less of a fat-ass than I was a month ago. Just several more months and I'll not be completely disgusted when I look in a mirror.